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前几天在China Daily读了一篇英文美文，感觉写的太好。遂摘抄如下，并将自己翻译的中文帖于文章结尾处，由于水平有限希望大家多多谅解！

Loving with an Open Hand

 

The other day as I talked with a friend I recalled a story that I heard this summer. "A compassionate person, seeing a butterfly struggling to free itself from its cocoon, and wanting to help, very gently loosened the filaments to form an opening. The butterfly was freed, emerged from the cocoon, and fluttered about but could not fly. What the compassionate person did not know was that only through the birth struggle can the wings grow strong enough for flight. Its shortened life was spent on the ground; it never knew freedom, never really lived."

I call it learning to love with an open hand. It is a learning which has come slowly to me and has been wrought in the fires of pain and in the waters of patience. I am learning that I must free the one I love, for if I clutch or cling, try to control, I lose what I try to hold.

If I try to change someone I love because I feel I know how that person should be, I rob him or her of a precious right, the right to take responsibility for one's own life and choices and way of being. Whenever I impose my wish or want or try to exert power over another, I rob him or her of the full realization of growth and maturation. I limit and prevent by my act of possession, no matter how kind my intention.

I can limit and injure by the kindest acts of protection or concern. Over extended it can say to the other person more eloquently than words, "You are unable to care for yourself; I must take care of you because you are mine. I am responsible for you."

As I learn and practice more and more, I can say to the one I love: "I love you, I value you, I respect you and I trust that you have the strength to become all that it is possible for you to become - if I don't get in your way. I love you so much that I can set you free to walk beside me in joy and in sadness. I will share your tears but I will not ask you not to cry. I will respond to your needs. I will care and comfort you, but I will not hold you up when you can walk alone. I will stand ready to be with you in your grief and loneliness but I will not take it away from you. I will strive to listen to your meaning as well as your word, but I shall not always agree. Sometimes I will be angry and when I am, I will try to tell you openly so that I need not hate our differences or feel estranged. I can not always be with you or hear what you say for there are times when I must listen to myself and care for myself, and when that happens I will be as honest with you as I can be."

I am learning to say this, whether it be in words or in my way of being with others and myself, to those I love and for whom I care. And this I call loving with an open hand.

I cannot always keep my hands off the cocoon, but I am getting better at it!

 

放爱一条生路

前几天，当我和我的朋友闲谈的时候，我想起了我在暑假中听道的一个故事。一个好心人看见一只蝴蝶挣扎着想从茧中出来，他想去帮助它，他非常轻柔的将茧开口处的丝松开。最终蝴蝶破茧而出，它拍动着翅膀但是却总是不能飞起来。这个好心人不知道他刚才所犯下的错误，一只蝴蝶只有通过在破茧的斗争中，才能让它的翅膀锻炼的足够强壮以适于飞舞。现在在它有限短暂的生命里，它不得不待在地上，它永远不知道自由，永远不能真正的活着。

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